Caring for a sick kid is hard.
But you know what’s even harder? Re-adjusting to regular life once they’re healthy again.
There are a lot of things that we let slide when kids are sick. There’s more screen time. Popsicles for breakfast are totally ok. And we will drop everything to get whatever our kid wants. I mean, who could resist that sad little kid on the couch?! Not to mention, no school!
But these are absolutely not the behaviors and attitudes that are not going to fly during the rest of the time.
I have found that it’s often much more difficult to get my kids back into the swing of things than to take care of a sick, sleepy kiddo.
So How Do We Readjust from Caring for a Sick Kid?
1. Explain
Make sure to let your kid know the reason that things are a little topsy-turvy right now. And tie it to their illness.
This could sound like, “Sweetie, I want you to rest your body right now so you can get healthy, so I’m going to let you watch some extra TV.” Or, “I know your throat is really sore right now, so it’s ok to have popsicles for breakfast when we’re sick.”
The bonus to this is that if you have other, healthy, kids in the house, it should help them feel less jealous. They still have to eat healthy/go to school/do chores, but they also get to not feel like absolute garbage.
And, it’ll help with the transition because when you re-explain that they’re not sick so they don’t get to eat Jell-o all day you’ll have already built your case!
2. Changes to Routine Matter
If you are raising a kid who really relies on routine, give them lots of heads up about how things will change when they’re sick. And then when they’re back on the mend, do the same for when things go ‘back to normal.’
If your kid is in that middle ground of sickness, I would try to maintain what routine you have, as much as possible.
If it’s not possible, make it a point to let them know where routine is being ignored. Like, for example, that it’s ok to spend all day in pajamas when we’re sick. But also check in with these kids to make sure that’s their actual preference. They may be more comfortable if they can continue to follow their routine, like getting dressed in the morning. But some small tweaks, like wearing cozy clothes instead of school clothes, may still be appreciated!
Social stories about being sick, staying home from school/daycare, and going to the doctor are also wonderful tools. If you have to make a doctor appointment, and have the luxury of a few options, I may choose to have the doctor appointment later in the day to help kids adjust to the idea better.
3. Plant the Seed for ‘Going Back to Normal’
The afternoon before they go back to school, you can start saying things like, “What do you think your friends will say when you come back tomorrow?” or “What are you excited to do at recess?” or something else that lets them know this is inevitable.
DO NOT ask questions that make it sound like they have a choice, i.e. “Are you looking forward to being back in school?”
This gives them a chance to work on accepting change, which let’s be real, can be hard for lots of us!
4. It’s More Fun to be Healthy
You can gently remind them of all the fun things they can do when they’re healthy whenever they start whining about not getting to watch all the TV/eat all the pudding, etc. Then offer a distraction of getting to do one of those fun things!
5. Lay the Groundwork for Next You’re Caring for a Sick Kid
When my kids are sick enough to have to stay home, but not totally miserable, I try to make the first day of staying home as boring as possible. In a genuine effort to make sure the rest of the house doesn’t get sick, I try to keep them in their rooms. (I do go in to hang out with them, read or pIay board games. They’re not in solitary confinement, I’m just trying to reduce exposure.) I will also limit home much extra screen time there is, and the older ones aren’t allowed to play extra video games (because it’s more stimulating than just watching TV, so it doesn’t encourage kids to doze off and nap).
This helps remove my suspicions that a kid is faking because I haven’t set it up that staying home is necessarily a great reward.
Take it up a Notch to Thriving Household!
This could be a golden chance to go from good to great! If there is a routine you’ve wanted to work on, or a new habit you wanted to build in your family, implementing it now would make a lot of sense.
So if you’ve been wanting to streamline your morning routine, go for it! Just tell your kid, “Hey, when we get back to being healthy, we’re going to try moving toothbrushing to right after getting dressed, while you’re already by the bathroom.” (Or fill in whatever makes sense for your family!)
Recovering From Caring For A Sick Kid
You don’t have to finish the long days of caring for sick kidswith frazzled nerves and feeling like everything you’ve worked for has fallen apart. With a little planning, and just keeping the end in mind, you have the opportunity to come out the other side feeling confident and energized!